Relationships are never easy. You are going along fine and single until one day someone else pops into your wonderfully enjoyable existance and suddenly you've got to stop thinking about the "me" and start thinking about the "we". Complications always arise, especially if he isn't into meditative yoga and you aren't into red sportscars, with compromises being made all over the place. It is extra complicated if one (or both) of you are heroes.

Being a hero is a complicated job - it's got lousy hours, it's very demanding and spandex isn't easy to clean. Things get doubly complicated if there is someone else involved. Relationships need time to bloom and if you're always making excuses to get out of a date so you can save the world, it won't go very far. Being in a relationship takes effort which can sometimes be too much for even those with super-strength. On the other hand, the single hero can often be a lonely hero, wanting more from life than just fame and fortune. Let's see if some of the tips below can't help you get / maintain a date!

• Always be aware of your date's lack of powers. You might be able to run at 150kph, but how is she going to get to the restaurant?

• If you've got super-strength then be very gentle (unless your date has a solid exoskeleton). You may have only wanted to give him a gentle cuddle, but there is nothing romantic about having to go to ER.

• Don't date team-mates! You'll throw the whole team chemistry off and if you ever break up... well, the rest of the team probably will want to avoid the whole issue.

• If you do date team-mates, then don't smooch on patrol, no cuddling during briefings and no skipping out on combat practise for "alone time". As a hero, when you are on duty you need to be as professional as possible. Off duty is when you are allowed to play.

• Don't date villains! Sure, you've spent a lot of time together and have studied each other's every weakness, but don't mistake that for a relationship. Besides, one of you is sure to take it badly when it ends and swear vengence.

• If you are dating a citizen then be careful not to lure villains back to their house - no-one is ever happy about being taken hostage and used as bait!

• Don't wear matching costumes. That's just sickening.

• If things get intimate, always use protection. For radiation heroes, this means a lead-lined suit.

• Plant control heroes never fail to impress a girl by producing a single red rose infront of their eyes. Just don't overdo it. One rose = romantic. Thousands of roses dominating her apartment = end of the date + restraining order.

• Try not to date the citizens you save. A hero that does that gets a certain kind of reputation... maybe you want to be one of "those" heroes, maybe you don't...

• Don't date sidekicks. This is wrong on so many levels. Good thing Paragon City doesn't license sidekicks!

• Sometimes your hearts may bond, but your powers never will. FireGuy and Ice Maiden may love each other, but it will just never work out...

• If you do have a dating mishap, don't try to bury yourself in your work by taking on Freakshow single handed. Get back out there, try the clubs, chat to people during inter-team events. You never know who you'll find waiting just for you!

So there you go - a couple of the do's and don'ts of dating in Paragon City. Remember, enjoy yourselves but always take care of your heart(s). Ciao!

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We see what goes on. It was the idea that founded a newspaper in Paragon City - people distantly watching the action that goes on in Paragon City, unable to participate. Mere spectators to the action that occurred around them. It was this lack of involvement by the citizenry in the daily life of Paragon City that led to the creation of The Paragon Beholder which aimed to give citizens and heroes alike a street's eye view of what was going down (and coming up) in Paragon City. But what is the motivation of UnSub, the founder of the Beholder? Who is he really?

Beholder: Thank you for agreeing to this interview, UnSub.

UnSub: That's fine. I recognise the arrogance in having my own holdings interview me, but I would be foolish to provide help to the competition.

Beholder: Can you please tell us a bit about your origins?

UnSub: To keep it simple, when a mad scientist tells you, "Here, hold this for a moment", don't. It's cliched, but I'm an amnesiac, so I remember little about me prior to a year ago. I remember my creation, but not much else. Vangard helped me get on my feet after that and gave me my name - Unknown Subject. UnSub.

Beholder: How did you go about setting up the Beholder then?

UnSub: I was doing reasonably well in the heroism stakes, solving crimes that a lot of the flashier teams wouldn't touch since it involved "thinkin' not a-fightin'". Then the Rikti struck... they wiped out a lot of the other established papers in their attacks on the city, while a lot of journalists got killed trying to get footage. There was a near complete media blackout on what was going on. This scared a lot of the ordinary citizens - they had seen their heroes knocked down for the first time and had no idea what was happening.

I could get close enough to the Rikti to get information off them and knew that what I was seeing wasn't as bad as people thought. Oh, don't get me wrong - it was a bitter fight that was occuring in the streets of Paragon City - but the heroes were generally holding their own. If citizens knew this, they would be less panicked, so I started to try to get the information out to them. That's how the Paragon Beholder was born - a simple war report available from a few street corners in Paragon.

Beholder: There have been some claims that those war reports gave the Rikti intelligence information...

UnSub: I've heard those claims too and I think that it's a load of crap. The Rikti were an invading army of unknown technological ability. They would have done reconnaissance on Earth before launching an attack. They probably also had all our communications tapped as well. We still don't know how much they know about Earth. One measily street paper hardly added to that collection of intelligence.

Besides, the Beholder only ever told about what had happened, not what was going to happen. We keep power descriptions to a minimum so villain groups can't work out appropriate defences to certain heroes and we avoid digging tabloid-style into the social lives of heroes. I know some things about some very prominant heroes that would destroy their fame, but as long as they serve the greater good, I keep my mouth shut. The second they start being more harm than help, that's when I'll start to act.

Beholder: Is that a threat?

UnSub: A warning. If they choose to call themselves heroes then they should act like it. They don't have to kiss babies and save kittens from trees if they don't want to, but they do have to meet certain standards. I will remind them of those standards if I have to.

Beholder: What do you see for the future of the Beholder?

UnSub: As long as it remains both interesting and wanted, I'll see that it keeps coming out. Obviously there is a bit of news lull at the moment - the Rikti invasion has been repulsed and the Birthplace of Tommorrow is being rebuilt. There are still stories out there though, if you are willing to look. Freelancers send in some very good work. In the end, if people are willing to read it, the Beholder will come out.

UnSub

Interview is continued in the adjacent column...

Aries: (March 21—April 19)
You may have lost a dear friend, but on the bright side: perky teenaged sidekicks are a dime-a-dozen.

Taurus: (April. 20—May 20)
You will develop a sever case of wall-crawl envy.

Gemini: (May 21—June 21)
A member of the opposite sex will repeatedly turn you down because of their infatuation with your alter ego.

Cancer: (June 22—July 22)
Realizing that a life of crime fighting was no longer a life of yours, you'll throw away your costume and powers. Then something bad will happen and you think that a world without your super heroics only leaves a million other heroes to do your job, and you pick it right back up again.

Leo: (July 23—Aug. 22)
When in doubt look for the guy with shifty eyes and twirling their moustachio.

Virgo: (Aug. 23—Sept. 22)
After a long period of being out of the spotlight your finally due for a come back, maybe even a costume change!

Libra: (Sept. 23—Oct. 23)
You are going to teach a group of pre-teen adolescents a valuable lesson on safety: don't try an jump your bikes over a broken power line, call the proper authorities and always buckle your safety belts.

Scorpio: (Oct. 24—Nov. 21)
Your muscles seem to be in full flex for what ever you do; consult a physician.

Sagittarius: (Nov. 22—Dec. 21)
Sure you save the world from time to time, but are you really doing all you can to solve the worlds social problems like sexism in a workplace environment.

Capricorn: (Dec. 22—Jan. 19)
You can clam not to be a role model all you want, but when you beat crooks to a bloody pulp what are you teaching the kids?

Aquarius: (Jan. 20—Feb. 18)
A friend or family member has become engaged to wed your most fiendish nemesis... how awkward!

Pisces: (Feb. 19—March 20)
Be careful, you're slacking off on your oath to use your powers for the betterment of human kind.

Beholder: There are some claims that the Beholder is gender discriminatory in its use of the word "hero" instead of "hero and heroine".

UnSub: Traditionally "hero" has been a purely masculine term, I agree. But I have to argue that, like the term "actor", it can now equally refer to both the male and female. The term "heroine" has always had a slightly derogatory implication to it and has been often used as an insult... plus it sounds like the drug. Refering to a "hero" or "heroes" makes things clearer.

When the Beholder uses the term "hero" it uses it in a gender neutral way. Regardless of what sex you are, it is your actions that make you a hero - arguing masculine / feminine boundaries in this area is being overly pedantic. Some people disagree with this policy, but that's the way I see it.

Beholder: What do you see as the future of Paragon City?

UnSub: Obviously we have to wait until it is fully rebuilt, with the wait being sometimes tedious. People can read the Beholder to pass the time! (laughs) Seriously, I wonder how Paragon City will look and feel. I've got some of my own ideas, but going into such a rebuilt city... it will be a new beginning.

When it does re-open, however, I think the villains are in for a nasty shock. They have a horde of enthusiastic heroes out here waiting to get at them. I hope they are getting their rest!

Beholder: Thanks for your time.

UnSub: No problem.